Resurrecting Hope in Transition

Uncertain, unpredictable, volatile, inconsistent... these and many other unstable-oriented adjectives (UOA's) are occupying a good portion of our society's thinking these days. We are in an age of transition. Transition is OK... for everyone else. Tolstoy said, "Everyone thinks of changing the world, but no one thinks of changing himself." When UOA's call for me I'd rather not pick up the phone. They're messy and usually call collect. Yes, I've had lots of experience with change. Jobs, deaths, fires, relationships, and parenting have all brought opportunity for immense transition. One would assume that by now I would be able to navigate these waters with a great outlook. Not necessarily.

I had a conversation with our 14-year old daughter recently. She knows our family is almost certainly facing some kind of dramatic change in the near future. She went out of her way to assure me that whatever the changes were, she was committed to being positive. I was so grateful to hear her unsolicited encouragement. I looked at her for a moment and thanked God for her.

And then I asked God to protect her.

Because hope can do something for her but it can also do something to her.

Don't get me wrong. I want her to hope. It's what we're told to do. "Be joyful in hope". I know it's good. But I've lived long enough to know that anything good can cast a shadow. In the case of hope, the shadow is called vulnerability. The truth is, hope opens me up to potential disappointment in a way that not hoping doesn't. Hope is a down the road, future-oriented investment and like any good human I'd rather have the immediate payoff of anxiety.*

Still, her resolve helped me. The 14-year old is positive. I will be as well. And you can be too. Wrestling with transition has helped me come up with three action points for you...
1-Be still. Be in the moment. You cannot fast-forward and you can't afford to go in reverse. The only thing left is to be where you are, right now. Something internal must happen before the season changes and internal things can't be rushed... nor the seasons.

2-Hold on to what you know is true. (Which is what the pastor from Mtn Valley reminded me last weekend.) There are many UOA's out there that may or may not happen. Focusing on them only makes life overwhelming. Simplify. Focus on what you know to be true and then let all the other things come or go as they need.

3-Accept responsibility of being joyful in hope. Not choosing to hope is giving into fear and blame. Sometimes the only person you blame is yourself. It feels tough but it's really not. When you blame yourself it reinforces fear. Then you end up convincing yourself that you cannot do this, you cannot change. Well, that's not an option so accept the responsibility.

*June Issue of The Atlantic - George Vaillant - provides interesting study on happiness and hope.

Questions lead to Answers lead to Questions

There are questions that need answers. Fortunately answers can be found. But that only presents another set of problems because I've found the best answers always to lead to more and better and deeper and interestinger questions.

I believe Jesus is The Answer.

But sooner or later He leads me to more questions. So, I keep living in the middle of answers and questions... in that shadow thing that Elliot wrote about in "The Hollow Men"... I live there because honestly, where else would I go? (Isnt that what Peter exclaimed? John 6)

I live there also because not having everything explained seems to make some sense. Mystery isn't the absence of meaning it's the presence of meaning too great to understand.

But then there are the things that do make sense to me and here's one that keeps me hanging around Jesus... He's the only religious leader to talk about sin and claim to be the remedy for sin. Other religions offer enlightenment, habits, karma, reincarnation, rules, the law and other belief systems in order to make up for my deficiency. Jesus is the only one who said to me, "Hey, you have a problem that is way worse than anything you could dream up and it's not going to change by trying harder. It's only going to change by letting me pay the price. And I will. Because I love you more than anything you can imagine." (that's me paraphrasing what Jesus said in the NT) He's the only one in history who ever said anything like that.

Something like that is just crazy enough to believe.

Uncertainty is an Asset

I’m enjoying reading a little book entitled Art and Fear, Observations on the Perils and Rewards of Artmaking. One of the authors tells of an interchange he had with his piano teacher where in frustration he said, “But I can hear the music so much better in my head than what comes out of my fingers.” The instructor replied, “What makes you think that ever changes?” The teacher raised an expression of self-doubt to a simple observation of reality and as he did uncertainty became an asset.

And you say, “I had the idea of this job looking so much better in my mind than it is actually turning out.” Or “My vision of this marriage was so much more fulfilling than it is revealing itself to be.” Or “I see the spiritual victories more clearly and victoriously happening in my mind’s eye than what is actually happening.” Or any number of things along those lines. Yet, if it works out exactly each time just as you’ve guessed that it will there would be no uncertainty.

And there would be no reason for faith.

Uncertainty is your asset. The knowledge that this whole thing (i.e. job, marriage, dream, vision, hope, etc…) could fall a part if you’re not careful is what keeps you praying, hoping, and persevering. Virginia Stem Owens says, “To spy out the reality hidden in appearances takes perseverance.” The appearance is that the distance between your vision and the actual execution is too great. The reality is this tension keeps you focused.

Unless you quit.